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I am a 27 year old
guy living a normal life. I have a Masters degree in Biochemistry,
and I work for a Fortune 500 company in the US Midwest doing research.
I have two cats, a turtle, and five fish, am currently single,
and I enjoy crossdressing in my spare time. Here is my story:
First, some quick
facts about me : )
I have been crossdressing
for 19 years.
and shoes are my favorite clothes.
I am 5'8", 135
I wear about a size
7 (juniors), and a size 9 shoe (womans).
My measurements are
My favorite sport
is hockey (I play roller-hockey and broomball, about as close
as I can get)
My favorite drink
is single malt scotch. I also love good wine, and really most
other drinks as long as they are mid to top shelf : ) I hate cheap
beer! But a pint of Smithwicks? Mmmm.
I discovered crossdressing
quite by accident when I was young. I had recently learned to
masturbate by rubbing myself against various cloths - towels,
my sheets, etc (also by accident). Instinctively I thought about
girls from school that I liked while doing so. I don't really
know why, because I didn't know how sex worked at the time. Like
I said, it was instinct. Of course this got me wondering what
it would be like to rub myself against girl clothes. So the next
time I had a chance, I rumaged through my mom's and sister's closets
and drawers until I found something that felt nice. It turns out
the softest and most distinctly feminine (ie the fabric does not
exist in male clothing) articles I found were pantyhose.
Well eventually I
started wondering what else pantyhose were good for, and I tried
a pair on. Wow, did that feel nice. I liked it so much I started
putting on as many pairs as I could. Whenever I was home alone
I would make a list of my favorite pairs and what order I should
put them on in, then I would dress up and wear them around until
someone came home. One thing lead to another, and I started trying
on other clothes of my mom's and sister's. Eventually I would
wear full outfits, though the pantyhose were always my favorite
part. Not to mention they were the easiest thing to hide too!
When I started driving,
I made a habit of stopping at K-Mart on the way home and buying
a pair of pantyhose from time to time. It was really tough walking
in to the store and picking them up. I was actually so scared
the first few times that I stole them instead of buying them.
Which is another story altogether. I eventually gathered a fair
collection, which I hid in the back of one of my desk drawers.
I also experimented
with tampons, which I don't recommend on any sort of regular basis
now that I know better. They can dry you out and make things terribly
uncomfortable as well as cause scratches and scrapes than can
lead to infections, etc . . . but before I knew better, it seemed
to make sense. Anyway, if you try it, just be careful.
At some point, I just
couldn't wait long enough to be home alone, so I'd sneak a pair
of pantyhose or two into the bathroom when I'd shower and wear
them in the shower. I bet you can't tell why I now love pantyhose
and wearing them in the water in particular . . . Again the pantyhose
were amazingly convenient because I could string them up underneath
my bed and they would dry pretty quickly.
Of course, nobody
hides such a big secret in his parent's house without getting
caught eventually. I was actually caught several times. My parents
were not supportive or understanding in the least . . . in fact
they tried to put me in therapy for it. Among other things it
lead to me leaving my parent's house and not speaking to them
for five years . . . so PLEASE if you know a crossdresser don't
try to put them in therapy : )
I'll skip ahead to
college at this point, as it's the next significant event in my
crossdressing. Interestingly the next time I crossdressed was
for a roomate's sociology project in which I went to Bob Evans
in a dress and he recorded peoples' reactions. While none of my
friends at the time knew how much I enjoyed crossdressing, and
I certainly did not let on that I was enjoying it, I couldn't
help but get excited when everyone told me I looked better in
the dress than the girl whom we borrowed it from. I had a few
other experiences like this, such as the Rocky Horror Picture
Show, but nothing of real significance.
The next important
development was when I moved in with my then girlfriend (later
to become my fiancee, and now my ex). We have a very open sexual
relationship, and it was not long before I told her that I enjoyed
dressing up in womens' clothing. She was exceptionally supportive
of me, and offered up her entire wardrobe. Then one night, with
both of us slightly drunk, she got out the digital camera while
I dressed up. It was just play at first, pretending to be a model
and photographer. I started changing outfits, doing different
"sets". We ended up spending the entire night taking
photos, and by morning I had quite a collection.
I asked if I could
post the photos on a Yahoo group, just to see how people reacted
to them. I was encouraged when membership took off, and one "fan"
started emailing me. Jade Sky (my photographer/ex's "pen"
name) and I started doing regular sets. Each time, I would go
a little bit further towards being a girl. I started painting
my nails and doing my makeup for sets. After awhile I started
shaving my legs, which eventually led to shaving my entire body.
At this point, I
suspected that I might have enough of a membership to start a
pay site. I I had worn every single outfit that Jade owned, and
as a poor college student could not afford to support my "habbit".
For a long time this site barely paid for itself. It was more
a labor of love so to speak. New outfits were few and far between,
and usually came out of my own pocket when I could afford them.
The site certainly did not cover studio equipment (which at this
point only consists of a new camera, a poor quality light, and
some extra sheets for backdrops). But I have made due with things
that were in my budget, and the site has been incredibly rewarding.
I had always intended
to create a "resources" section for my site, but it's
been difficult to find time. This area is important to me, however,
even if only one person ever finds it useful. I know how hard
it was to start crossdressing, and how many times I questioned
if what I was doing was right or ok. I was right, and I am ok.
I wish someone had told me that earlier.
As for my friends
and family, my closest friends all know about the site. And of
course my ex knows. The rest of my family? Who knows, but I hope
not : )